Sh*t Psych Unit Staff Say

  1. We are going to have to take your clothes, phone, & other possessions.
  2. You can’t have those shoes. They are dangerous…
  3. No shoelaces…
  4. Can’t have those pants…
  5. Those bras aren’t allowed. They have wire.
  6. Can’t bring in outside food either.
  7. Are you seeing or hearing things that aren’t there?
  8. Yes, you ARE suicidal. I KNOW you are.
  9. I heard you aren’t cooperating.
  10. *Nurse #1 gives night-time pills. Nurse #2 tries to give exact same pills minutes later.* You won’t take them? No, you were NOT just given these. So then, you’re refusing medication? Is that right?
  11. *sigh* I heard that you refused your medications last night.
  12. *constantly ignores side effect concerns*
  13. Just take whatever pills they give you. You can stop once you get out.
  14. You get to leave tomorrow!
  15. Who said you get to leave tomorrow? I don’t know when you get to leave… but certainly NOT tomorrow.
  16. If you keep talking like that (i.e. manic speed), no one will take you seriously.
  17. STOP. THAT. NOW.
  18. Doctor 1: You need to be on SSRIs. Doctor 2: You need to be on lithium. Doctor 3: You need to be on a mood stabilizer and antidepressants. Doctor 4: You need to be on antipsychotics.
  19. There is no other psychiatrist you can see. *glare*
  20. Since you keep INSISTING on reading about side effects, I printed this off for you. *hands over 20+ pages of material on one drug*
  21. Why do you keep reading about bipolar disorder? You need to STOP.
  22. Where did you even get that psychopharmacology book from?
  23. CBT? What’s that?
  24. If you don’t take your meds, you’ll end up living under a bridge… on bath salts… eating the flesh off of someone’s face.
  25. What’s catastrophizing?
  26. Stop dancing. That’s not allowed. You’ll hurt youself.
  27. If you don’t take what I prescribe, you can’t leave.
  28. *opens door at night & floods room with light every few minutes*
  29. How long did you sleep last night?
  30. No, actually you didn’t really sleep. You should try to sleep more!

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