Would you take this approach if you were in this situation?


Regarding the recent Washington Post article on a sister’s suicide,

I was asked what I would do if I were in the sister’s shoes…


Would I speak out about my sister’s suicide?

Would I keep such information private?



Here was my response:


Given my personal struggle with mental illness (including major depressive disorder),

I believe that I would be open about the entire situation.


Not being open is not being honest…?…

and not being honest about something as big as this

just doesn’t feel right to me.


I understand that there is such stigma attached to suicide,

but I think that honesty such as that displayed in this story

is the first step in really effectively combating such stigma.


Suicide is not an indicator of a ‘weak’ or ‘bad’ person,

as you can see here…


it is the tragic end of a beautiful life

consumed by the darkness of depression.


Depression literally can alter your mind

so that you perceive everything through a negative filter,

including yourself…


If a depressed mind is constantly telling you

that you are only a burden on others,

suicide is no longer seen as an ‘easy’, ‘selfish’ option,

in that mindset,

but a ‘selfLESS’ option.


That is how depression can alter one’s thinking.


It is a terrible condition that is NOT taken nearly as seriously

as it should be.


It is a terrifying one


it can strip you

of everything you are.


If more people open up about it,

maybe less people will hide it

and maybe more will be more willing to go seek professional help


I truly admire this level of openness and bravery.




More at:


8 thoughts on “Would you take this approach if you were in this situation?

  1. “it is the tragic end of a beautiful life”

    Do you want people to judge your life despite not living it? Why do you do it for others?

    We the suicidal are tired of it. We don’t just die. We choose to die because life isn’t satisfying. If it’s depression, whatever. We don’t have to live with it if we don’t feel like it. The world has rejected us plenty of times. Life has been cruel to us. Why shouldn’t we tell it to fuck off?


    1. I understand that you are stating that suicide is a choice… but I would not state that it is the BEST choice. There are both pharmaceutical and non-pharmaceutical approaches to treating depression. These approaches are incredibly successful in improving one’s quality of life, of making it a life that one would not want to give up. Living with depression can make it seem as if suicide is the best choice. It is not. Choosing to create a life worth living is the best choice. Life can be cruel. I know this… BUT you have the power to create a better life for yourself and for others. Don’t let depression win. Take back your life. It IS worth living.


      1. If I forced you to castarate yourself and not be able to procreate, you’d be up in arms.

        So why do you and all other people who love life get to decide for me, but I can’t decide for you? Why is your desire to live deserves respect, but my desire to die not?


      2. If you are experiencing suicidal ideation, I urge you to seek professional help immediately. I do not always “love life”. I often myself struggle with extreme depression… but I manage, with the support of others, to push past it and see that the desire to not life is temporary. The darkness is temporary. There is beauty in life and in choosing to live. I strongly encourage you to go to the nearest hospital if you are suicidal. I have felt that way before, the intense hopelessness, but it does not have to take over. There are resources available to help you push past it.


      3. I’m not interested, though. I don’t care how good it can get. It’s my choice. I have my reasons. I am tired.

        Everything is temporary, including the best moments. It’s not even hopeless right now. I’m just tired.


      4. A close friend of mine had a suicide attempt last month. I went with her to the ER to get her to check herself into the psychiatric facility at the hospital. She is now doing much better, not struggling so hard against her depression. It is definitely worth considering, getting help…


      5. Lee Crutchley created a depression workbook which I (as well as many patients) have found incredibly helpful. It addresses common thinking distortion associated with depression, basically CBT. Maybe this could help you as well. 🙂


    2. I recently started reading “Furiously Happy” about someone who struggles with her depression. I love it, thus far. I would highly recommend it to anyone who is experiencing depression. It may change your perspective. 🙂


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